Today I was in store for a very special surprise. Not the kind where you jump up and down with excitement and elation. But the surprise of finding where your heart is and the urgent call to visit the valley of weeping once again on behalf of another.
Last year I had two miscarriages which happened about 3 months apart. It was the most painful time of my life. To me it was as if I had lost one of my living children. Eight months have gone by and not a day goes passes that I do not think of those two little angels who are thriving in Heaven. Time is healing the pain but some days the grief comes as an unexpected visitor.
However, today the Lord had something in mind that would open my heart to another's pain. Believe me, I felt the sting for another as I have never before experienced. Maybe the Lord gave me a little glimpse or "prick" in my heart of how He truly aches for us and the deeper reality that He not only understands our sorrows, but he feels them as if they were His own. He claims every pain. He weeps in the deep recesses of His heart for his beloved.
My phone rang this afternoon and I found myself talking with the sweetest young lady who had lost her baby a month ago. The little boy was 19 weeks gestation because the mother's cervix was incompetent. They named the baby Caleb and he lived for an hour and a half after he was born. My heart stung with sorrow as this precious woman poured her distress out. We agreed to meet next week and I want to give her God's love. I am so happy that I can give her something...I can give her comfort, encouragement, gifts, and most of all love. I have cried all afternoon for this precious woman. God loves us so much. We so often underestimate the depth of His feelings for us. He truly captures every tear and treasures them as priceless gems.
Thank you again Lord for sorrows. God, I cannot love in sincerity unless I have tasted the sting of death, loss and disappointment. Love means more to you than anything Lord. It is so obvious. Oh the valleys formed within our being through tremendous aches that only form a space to drink in Your love. The beauty of Your ways God...overwhelm me with awe and wonder. Incredible Lover and Hero of My soul.
BLESSED IS THE MAN WHOSE STRENGTH IS IN YOU, WHOSE HEART IS SET ON PILGRIMAGE.
AS THEY PASS THROUGH THE VALLEY OF BACA (WEEPING) THEY MAKE IT A SPRING;THE RAIN ALSO COVERS IT WITH POOLS. THEY GO FROM STRENGTH TO STRENGTH;EACH ONE APPEARS BEFORE GOD IN ZION. PSALMS 84: 5-7